meh

I'm soooo poor! So everyone is getting cookies for Christmas this yeaar! Yupe. It's been decided so deal with it!

So this has been a horrible week and I'm glad it's over.

I got into a car accident and messed up the front end of my truck real bad. What happened was that I had a green light and was almost about to cross it when a fire chief ran a red light through the intersection, causing the cars in front of me to break suddenly. I was on a hill and didn't have enough distance to break, so I hit the car in front of me. I was devastated. It was my first car accident, and it was my fault. I cried nonstop that day. I was on my way to school to pick up a take home final exam. The day already started off badly because my boyfriend woke me up with a phone call, saying he was stranded at work due to a flat tire. I drove over to his work and we waited for several hours for a friend to arrive with a jack and help us get the spare donut on his car. While we waited, I decided to quickly drive to school to pick up my final exam for my positive psychology class. On my way...I got into that accident...and I hit a brookdale counselor which made the experience even more depressing for me. Everyone was okay physically, and my truck got the worst damage. But on a positive note, everyone reamined calm and the cop was really nice to me. She gave me a ticket, but said if I showed up at the court date in January, all of my points would be dropped and I would just have to pay a fine. That made me feel horrible because I'm unemployed and have no money. My mom agreed to help me with paying the fine, but that made me feel even worse because I feel that all of this is my responsibility and I should have the money to pay for it. I've been crying about this for days :(
As for the fire chief who ran through the red light and caused this whole accident in the first place, my mom is doing everything she can to find out if he was going to a real emergency, or if he was too impatient and decided to run the red light. My mom tried to call the police office and see if there was any fires around that time, but everyone she talked to dodged the question and they promised to call her back. She never got a call back...

So this whole situation is weird, but I am willing to take all the blame and pay my fine. I still feel really bad about hitting that poor lady's car and wish that it never happened in the first place.

But another good thing is that a friend of my father is going to give me her car because she is too old to drive it. It's a 1995 Dodge Neon with only 88,000 miles on it. She kept it in good condition and it only needs an oil change. Monday, I'm going to the DMV with my mom and register it. As for my beat up truck...I guess it's going straight to the junkyard. My mom wants to take all of the expensive parts out of it (I've shelled out alot of money replacing so many parts over the years) and sell them on craig's list. I guess that could work...but I'm glad that I got a car so soon. Now I don't have to rely on driving my mom's car or asking Allen constantly to drive me places. As for having money for gas money...ugh...but atleast I have some source of transportation! And Christmas is around the corner, so hopefully I'll get some gas money to hold onto until I get a job.

So yeah...I'm still unemployed, I've been denied unemployment benefits because I'm in school, and my truck is messed up...ain't life swell? Oh! And Christmas is around the corner and I feel really bad about not having any money to spend on presents for my loved ones. I guess all of these presents will just have to be given out when I have money....many months after Christmas. The guilt mountain I have just keeps on growing.

But besides all the negative events and feelings I've had lately, I'm still trying to bounce back and cheer up. The holiday season can be just as enjoyable without all of the commercialism and stress of overindulging in material things. I'll just continue all of the traditions in a more....traditional way. I'll continue to be thankful with what I have, and of the people who still care about my poor ass.